After weeks of research, I decide to abandon my CDMA connection and buy an android GSM handset. Right after buying it, I walk two shops away to the Reliance store and ask for a GSM connection… should take a couple of hours, I think.
Ha! Guy at counter: Why do you want to shift to GSM? Me: Not enough good CDMA handsets. He: That’s true… but GSM gives problems. Me: I don’t care.. I just want it fast. He: It’ll take seven days and you have to provide fresh identification.
My pancard and press i-card (with my billing address) won’t do … I need to get a bank passbook, an updated one. I say forget it, I’ll just go elsewhere. I go to Airtel nearby… how long does it take to get my number ported? Seven days, he says, without looking up. Not happy, I walk to Idea next door. Seven days, the guy says, and says the ID I’m carrying will do. He looks helpful. Great… so let’s do it. I go back to Reliance, pay my bill and inform guy at Reliance that Idea is doing it now… Good for me, he says.
In this case, the network really follows me… I call both mobile providers daily for updates (sometimes more than once a day), desperate to use my new android phone. Reliance calls me almost daily too… asking me why I want to shift (old customer)… at first, I enthusiastically complain about the guy at the store and over the next few days, am reduced to asking them to just get it done… finally, I get a confessional call, where I’m informed that nothing has moved and will take another week.. so why not just stick with us? By now, I’m yelling and am used to putting on my rude voice effortlessly.. JUST DO IT, I tell them. Okay? No… the next call tells me that my number portability request is cancelled… Why? “Why don’t you put in a request to find out?” I won’t! Stern voice: “Well, then, if you don’t cooperate, we can’t help you.” I want to talk to a senior… “I’m the senior.”
Idea too has little idea what’s happening. “Today’s the seventh day, your old connection will switch off at midnight and after two hours, the new one will start working. Don’t worry… pucca.” At midnight, my old connection’s still working. Mad and feeling slightly foolish for believing them, I call customer care: “It’s 7 days minus Sunday and Diwali.” And Saturday? “No, only Sunday.”
I count 7 days, minus Diwali, Sundays and also throw in Bhai Dooj, etc. 3 more days to go then… I call after 3 days. Guy at Idea: Didn’t you just call? You didn’t get status then? Me: That was in the morning; now, it’s evening. What’s the status? “You can’t count Saturdays and Sundays.” Saturdays too? “Obviously, Saturday and Sunday.” Obviously.
Maybe I should just chuck the number and get a new one. I go to the Vodafone showroom. They seem happy to see me. I have a landline bill for my residence, but am not home during the day. No problem, they’ll verify at my office. Just give a colleague’s reference. No.. I’m not sharing any colleague’s contact. Just give the name, I'm told, it’s a formality. Okay, I guess. Three days later, I want to know why my connection hasn’t been activated. Customer care is full of assurances as usual and it should take anywhere from 24 hours to 72 hours. After being put on hold for 5 minutes, I head to the showroom. My connection hasn’t been activated since my colleague hasn’t presented his ID. Okay, and what if he shows his I-card, will it do? Hmmm, will it contain the address he stays at? I yell at the guy, “Would you know that about any of your colleagues?” Silence. Fine, meet my landlady… provided she’s not out for kirtan when you come. My landlady sounds wary when I call, “Aunty, they want to see your ID.” Getting a home loan was easier… I give up. Give me a prepaid card instead.. how long will that take? 24 hours! That was three days ago. I can’t recharge it online.. customer care says to visit the showroom.. I don’t have the time. “Then we can’t help you.” Do they have the number? “We can only give you the address.”
I try to prove to a friend that I’m not exaggerating… in front of her, I call up Reliance thrice.. a different status each time. The first one tells me everything is in order, the last tells me he’ll lose his job if he gives me a false commitment… I assure him he won’t; I have been getting such commitments all fortnight. When I call Idea, the male voice asks, “Madam bol rahin hain ya sir? (Is that a Madam or Sir).”
So, now I have to prioritise.. Chase Vodafone, try Airtel now or just chase Reliance? By now, I have written to the nodal officer, TRAI and the Corp Comm of Reliance… I guess I’ll just chase Reliance. I’d still rather retain my number. Meanwhile, use the new handset to play Angry Birds. When I first started playing it, I was so involved I thought a call would almost be intrusive… no such fear now!
PS: At midnight (November 10), the switch finally happened. Couldn't believe it was actually happening! It took almost 21 days. All is well with the world again... for now!
PS: At midnight (November 10), the switch finally happened. Couldn't believe it was actually happening! It took almost 21 days. All is well with the world again... for now!
